My plan was to have a fun, surprise evening in the city, a night that reflected who we are as a couple...nothing overly fancy; just something romantic, relaxed and fun.
A thousand years ago, we had shared our first romatic Valentine's Day dinner at The Fog City Diner in San Francisco and I wanted to replicate that evening as closely as I could. We'd start with a romantic dinner at The Fog City Diner in SF and then enjoy a comedy show at The Punchline, with the New Years countdown serving as the backdrop for me popping the question.
So we hopped on BART and headed out to the city for a fun New Years Eve night. I was more than a little nervous, but probably not for the reason you'd think. I was strangely relaxed about asking the question, but was exceedingly nervous about carrying the ring around in my pocket until midnight. I felt like I was being transparent, but was pleasantly surprised to find out that Jenna never noticed the thouand times I felt my pants pocket to make sure that the ring box was still there.
The energy in the city was great and it only added to the excitement I had for the events to come.
One of the advantages of knowing the plan for the night and, ultimately, knowing that I was going to propose is that I could relax and take everything in. I could see Jenna's mind swirling and could tell that she was a nervous mix of anxiousness and excitement. My mind, on the the other hand, was calm and I was enjoying taking in all the moments, big and small, that were making this night special. On our way to dinner and during I found myself thinking of all we had been through over the years and how many times we had done this very night before. Thinking of how many times we had had dinner and it was just a meal. How many times we had gone to see a comedy show and it was just another night. How many New Year's Eve nights we had shared and then just forgotten about. This night would be THE dinner, THE comedy show, THE NYE night that we would remember above any other.
We've always loved The Fog City Diner, ever since that first Valentine's so many years ago. Maybe it was the energy of the city and the feeling everyone has before the coming of the New Year, but even early in the evening it was shaping up to be more than special. Cliche as it sounds, the food tasted a little better, the drinkes were stronger and the feel of the restaurant was a little more relaxed. For those that aren't familiar with the restaurant, Fog City is on Embarcadero and overlooks the waterfront. Being NYE, there were thousands of revelers ambling about in anticipation of the countdown and firework show that would light up the waterfront. While tourists jockeyed for a good postion on the pier to watch the show we enjoyed a quiet dinner watching the world scramble around right outside our window.
I could've asked her a dozen different times during dinner and each would've been perfect, but I had a plan and dinner was just the beginning. If you know me, you that it wouldn't be genuine to me if I didn't have a little fun with Jenna before I asked her...so my first goal for dinner was to subtly give her the impression that tonight was just a NYE celebration...nothing else. I started hinting at a surprise for next Valentine's Day and how I thought 2013 was gonna be a great year for us. Watching her squirm and bite her tongue when I was giving her false information was admittedly a little twisted, but I knew the nights-end-payoff would more than make-up for the "WTFs" that were driving her heart and head crazy at that moment. My second goal for dinner was to plant a seed for the way I had planned to propose. I asked Jenna to think about a New Years resolution that involved us both and our future together. I asked her to just think about it and that at midnight we would share what we'd hoped for our new year.
After a delicious dinner, some strong drinks and some quality time together, it was time to head to The Punchline for the second part of our evening and the location that would be henceforth known as the "The Place Where I Proposed to Jenna".
I knew that the short time we had between dinner and the comedy show was one of the last times we could really talk before I proposed. What I wanted to tell her was how she was incredible and how nights like these, with her, make me feel lucky to be in love with my best friend. That's what I wanted to say, but Jenna; being in the dark about the signifigance of the evening and not wanting to be late for the show, just wanted to catch a cab. After a short "discussion" about the best place to catch a cab, we "settled" on her choice, moved to her spot and, almost as if God himself was teaching me a lesson about the importance of listening to your future wife, we immediately caught a cab.
We've seen countless shows at The Punchline and we've never had a bad time. That night we were seeing a San Francisco-based comic named Greg Proops and he always gives a great performance. I've always felt that there is is no better experience than enjoying good company, a few drinks and laughing till it hurts. Strangely, one of my favorite parts of visiting The Punchline has always been waiting in line. There is something to feeling the cold of the city air, the view of the buildings in the Financial District and the feeling of anticipation right before your about to have a great time. As we waited for the show we held each other close for warmth and laughed about whatever came to mind. It was hard to keep a smile off my face knowing that I was a few short hours from changing both our lives.
The Punchline was decorated to the hilt for the NYE countdown and we were seated at a table with a few other couples that were in good spirits. The show started slow, but really got going when the headliner came on. While everyone was laughing and enjoying themselves, I couldn't help but keep one eye on the clock. My own personal countdown-to-the-countdown was in full swing.
Sometime between 11:30 and 11:45pm I excused myself and headed for the bathroom for "last looks" and one last deep breath. I wanted to get the ring situated in the box the way I wanted Jenna to see it for the very first time.
Anyone who knows me knows that I have always had an interesting relationship with time; one that often finds me somewhere between several minutes and several hours late to just about everything. But in those last minutes, alone in the bathroom, on the verge of of asking Jenna to marry me I couldn't help but laugh to myself. In this singular endeavor I would, undoubtedly, be on time. In 15 minutes, no matter what, I was going to be engaged. For some reason that made me more calm. Somehow the knowledge of this very finite timeline made it easier than I could've ever imagined.
I took one last big breath, steeled my resolve and headed back to our seats to ask the biggest question of my life. I was happy, confident and, most importantly, ready. Just mere moments away and nothing could go wrong...right?
Wrong.
10 minutes till midnight and everyone is sharing that antsy feeling you get right before the countdown. Midnight is just that close and the anticipation in the air can be felt permeating throughout the crowd. 7 minutes till...The headliner is finishing his set and pacing on stage. At this point he's noticing that he's lost the crowd to excitement over the countdown and its all he can do to stall. Across the club I can see the wait staff handing out champagne in preparation for the toast. 6 minutes till...I've got the ring in hand and I'm staring at Jenna, she's never looked so beautiful. I want to tell her that she's my everything and that in this moment I've never been happier in my life. 5 minutes till...Jenna is staring back at me, beautiful as ever, with a look like she has something to say also. She leans forward and whispers...
"Babe, I really have to go to the bathroom."
What??!!!! Are you kidding!!!?? Seriously!!##$@! Damn that 4th glass of Sauvigon Blanc!!*%!
Jenna must have seen the concern for time in my eyes or the anger vein popping out of my forehead because she hastily assured me that she'd be quick and wouldn't dare miss the countdown.
I shouldn't have been surprised. Sometime between the opener finishing up and the headliner taking the stage, I realized Jenna had a good amount of drinks and hadn't used the bathroom yet. I also noticed that she had a buzz that could only be characterized as strong to quite strong. Its fairly easy to spot a strong buzz Jenna because no matter the concert, movie or comedy show all buzzed Jenna wants to do is talk about it. If its a good song, she wants to talk about it. If its a a scene she likes, she wants to talk about it. If its a funny joke, she wants to talk about it. Thats my buzzed Jenna.
4 minutes till...Our server is bringing champagne to our table, the toast is minutes away and Jenna is still in the bathroom. 3 minutes till...The comedian has given up his routine for clock watching and the energy amongst everyone is incredible. Its loud, its dark and somewhere in all the madness our server misteps and spills the entire tray of champagne flutes all over our table, my back, Jennas jacket and pretty much everyone else sitting at our table. 2 minutes till...the server is apologizing profusely. I'm trying to talk him back from the ledge and explain that I don't care about the spill. In a voice that is polite, but thinly veils my volcanic anger I let him know that all I want is a towel, some new champagne and for him to go away. I'm freaking out, trying to clean the table, her jacket and generally get ready for the countdown..and, oh yeah, STILL NO F##KING JENNA!!! 1 min and 30 seconds till...Jenna returns. All is right with the worldagain(I was worried she was gonna freak about her jacket, she did exactly the opposite. Gotta love buzzed Jenna). :45 seconds till...A dry table, a couple new glasses of champagne in hand and my plan back on track. Crisis averted. 5,4,3,2,1 seconds till...Happy New Year!!!! The place explodes as everyone welcomes in the New Year with hugs, kisses and revelry. I turn to Jenna and steal a kiss. We toast the New Year and take a big gulp of below average champagne. I've never been more sure about anything and now is the moment to make it real for both of us.
With the rest of the club raucously serenading us with a drunken version of "Auld Lang Syne" I turned to Jenna and I asked...
C: Sooo, whats your New Years Resolution?
J: I resolve to tell you that "I love you" more often, I don't say it enough. I'm gonna say it a lot more.
C: Awwwwwwww, babe. I love you.
J: So, whats your resolution?
C: My resolution is to be a great husband, if you'll let me. (Holding out the ring)Jenna Marie Reichenberg, will you marry me?
J: (inaudible half scream/cry/breakdown for several minutes) OF COURSE!!!!!!!
Surrounded by hundreds of people and yet it felt like we were the only two people there. I took a quick look around and while it was the most important thing to happen to either of us, it seemingly happened without a single partygoer in the club noticing anything. We just sat there looking at each other. Her not breathing, shaking like crazy and crying uncontrollably. Me worrying about the fact that she's not breathing, shaking like crazy and crying uncontrollably.
The show was over, the lights came on and people slowly filed out, but there we sat... my arm around her visibly shaking body and her eyes fixated on the ring that now occupied a spot vacant until a few moments prior. We were the perfect picture of opposites; me, almost unnaturally calm and Jenna, feeling all the effects of a combination of anxiety, panic and heart attack. Maybe it was the culmintaion of all the years we had shared, maybe a sense of relief or maybe it was just good, old fashioned shock, but whatever it was, her system was trying to process information that her heart, head and body just weren't ready to deal with it yet. As a newly minted fiance I jumped at the first official chance to do what every guy thinks he does so well...fix what's wrong. Do you need a drink? Bathroom? An oxygen tank? Nope. What does Jenna need moments after being proposed to? A cigarette, of course. In fact, she doesnt need just one, she needs many.
I find Jenna a cigarette and we head into the fresh air of the San Francisco night. As Jenna lights up in hopes of calming her nerves, I notice we are just in time to catch the end of the fireworks show on the Embarcadero. I pull Jenna into a bear hug and try to calm her down as we watch the night sky change colors with every loud burst. We knew that the celebration was just to mark the passing of another year, but we couldn't help but feel like it was for us, for our future, for our next step.
With the fireworks over and Jenna speed-smoking her third cigarette, I called my parents and relayed the news of the night. Knowing my plan from the beginning, my Mom's real interest was if Jenna survived the proposal and, if so, what condition she was in. I passed the phone to Jenna. After a few unintelligible words and a lot of tears I was talking to my mother again, trying to translate what Jenna had failed to be able to get out through the tears and hyperventilating.
I don't know how I expected Jenna to react. One of the many things I love about Jenna is that she is very different from me. In this moment, that difference was never more evident. Here I am, happier than I've ever been, but measured. Here is Jenna, so moved by her emotions that she literally can't move. I couldn't have dreamed for a better reaction.
We waded out into the sea of thousands on the streets and her grip on my hand was like a vice. It was as if she felt like it wouldn't be real if we lost touch, for even a second. While Jenna inhaled her final relaxation stick, I found a car to get us home. We ducked out of the madness and into the comfort of our ride. The quiet of the ride home was occasionally broken up by Jenna looking at her ring and losing it all over again.
I had planned what I thought was a perfect night and itended up exceeding all my expectations. I consider myself pretty blessed to have had few a hiccups happen along the way because they only served to add to the story of a truly unforgettable night.
I count myself pretty lucky...not just because she said yes on that memorable night. Its more than that. I'm lucky because I get to share my life with an incredible person. A person that can be so moved by everyday emotions. A person that speaks her mind. A person that can laugh and make me laugh. A person that is interesting even in the dull moments. A person that loves without regard for the pain it can sometimes bring. A person that learned to be patient for the the person she loved most. Simply put...I'm lucky because I'm marrying my favorite person.
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